What is a GANFYD?

Okay, I’ll tell you: GANFYD stands for: “Get A Note From Your Doctor!”.
Actually this phrase is frequently used by all sorts of bank- or insurance managers, employers, line managers, businesspeople or bureaucrats of any type. They use this phrase to fob off those people who want money off them.
Before you get one single cent (or penny) out of me, get a note from your doctor first or go away for ever – in the hope that some customers may chose the latter.
Unfortunately most disapointed customers chose to turn up at their doctor’s who then are faced with an unhappy and demanding patient. Sometimes the demand can not be met – which is probably exactly what the bureaucrats had in mind. But rather than being rude and firmly say “No!” to their customers they shift this burden off to the medical profession.
Usually it hits the poor General Practitioners.
We hospital doctors are only very occasionally asked for a GANFYD.
However, sometimes we are.
“There is someone waiting for you!” said nurse Betty.
“Who?”
“Dunno. Some relatives!”
“What do they want?”
“Dunno. Just go and ask them yourself!”
Seconds later I was facing a slightly overweight lady in her mid-fifties and her husband.
“It is about my mother!” she said.
“What’s wrong with her?”
“She was a patient here, about half a year ago. When she was discharged we took her home in our own car. Now we have learned that the insurance would have been liable for transport costs from hospital to home.”
“We will sting them to reimburse us!” adds hubby, “so we need a note from you to confirm she was really here!”
What the f… is this?
Do I remember all patients who might or might not have been here six months ago? Do they really ask me to look up piles of old medical records to check….?
How much is half an hour of my time worth? Sure it is not more than the taxi fare from hospital to wherever Mrs. Mum lives?
Thankfully we do have a very skillful secretary.
A few minutes later she gave me a letter which I signed with a smile:

“This is to certify that today, on January 4th I was informed by Mrs. Patientdoughther who explained that on July 30 she claims to have taken her Mum, Mrs. Patientdoughtermum in her own car at her own expenses from hospital to home.”

I must admit, on hospital-headed paper, with signature and stamp it looked really official.

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